


The Whole of It

by Caswillsaveme



Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: Angst, Drabble, Jeez, M/M, Power Dynamic, Thoughts i have to get out
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-25
Updated: 2018-05-25
Packaged: 2019-05-13 12:43:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 579
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14749101
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Caswillsaveme/pseuds/Caswillsaveme
Summary: Everyday now it seems Sherlock grows colder to the touch. Mycroft can feel the poison in the words and deductions he's making nowadays. Things seem to keep changing.





	The Whole of It

The quivers in his breathe seemed to be worsened with age. He couldn't help it or pay his way out of the deep regret painted across his face, his hands, his eyes. The power and pressing weight of running the whole of the British government was what took it all out of him. Thats what he said to himself atleast, filing all the hard emotions away for later examination. They were useless now. 

Christmas soon approached, though it always did these years. Creeping and clawing its way out from the winter months into the open frost. He remembered something, a birthday from years ago. A black half wrapped umbrella given from the young bright hands of his brother. Hands he had become used to in his youth, atleast. Mycroft regrettably wore that sentiment on his sleeve, his one weakness open for only him and Sherlock to know. Mycrofts umbrella glared at him from where it sat against the wall. It had always been like that, there were always things that Mycroft and Sherlock knew that no one else had. 

After being young for so long, it seemed like Sherlock had never grown out of the arrogance of his childhood. Mean words and poison flowed from his lips like they were going out of style. Somethings never changed, yet, somethings were best left unsaid, that was atleast something Mycroft understood. Though he had been lying his way through family dinners enough to last a life time. 

Days turned weeks, turned to years, turned to crude words and long lists. He kept them though, each list like crisp tainted gold. Despite the hate that oozed out of the cream hands who passed them along his way. The drugs made Sherlock lose himself, they made him weak, Mycroft felt as though, those words came out of his mouth more often than any others. The only words that matched him back in this cruel volley were no, they made him strong, clearer than ever. The years got harder, and so, did Sherlock. When Mycroft went away again to university, everyone could tell the difference. 

Sherlock no longer stared at the sky like it held diamonds, and his room skyrocketed full of new projects. New secret ones. The drugs piled up easily. His crystal, silk voice created empty connections with high people. Other kids from wealthy families, enough for him to be able to somehow be high almost eternally.  
Mycroft always came home for christmas. He could tell when something was different. Sherlock seemed unable to help but change these days. Dear brother hadn't even bothered to come downstairs Christmas eve night, an eerie silence rang through the place Mycroft thought was as close to a home could come. Mummy would give excuse after excuse for his absence, in the same understandable way that Mycroft would plaster a smile among his face and act like everything was okay. When his parents bid him goodnight, he poured deep golden liquor in a glass and let his head lead him upstairs. 

Everything felt foggy nowadays, even if his outward appearance was as composed as ever. Pacing toward the stairs he could hear loud sounds of angry violin compositions,  yelling, screaming at him through hallway after hallway. With every step closer, they cracked his head open like a watermelon. Once he reached the door he accidentally stepped on the loose step, signalling a loud creak to cut through the angery screaming torment. Mycroft cringed at his carelessness.


End file.
